My Top 10 Favorite Cool Fictional Swords

I mentioned a list of favorite cool fictional swords in the Hogfather review, not intending to ever actually make one. But... turns out I couldn't resist.

1) The Pure Nail (Hollow Knight) 

Wielder: The Knight

The Pure Nail is the strongest weapon in Hollow Knight. It's also absurdly hard to get (doing so requires making a long trek through a laser-spewing mountain, fighting a boss and two minibosses, progressing reasonably far in two separate questlines, and surviving a wave-defense thing, plus collecting a few truckloads of money to pay the Nailsmith.) I've never actually managed to get it in my playthroughs of Hollow Knight.

2) The Master Sword (The Legend of Zelda)

Wielder: Link

The Master Sword, also called the Sword that Seals the Darkness, is wielded by the Hero of Time to combat the evil Ganon. Repeatedly. It has a lot of different functions, stories, powers, etc, possibly as a result of there being like 20 games in the Legend of Zelda series. It usually has something to do with Ganon, it's almost always instrumental in defeating him, and it's always blue except when it's overgrown with moss and things.

3) Glamdring (Lord of the Rings)

Wielder: Gandalf

Glamdring Foe-Hammer was made by elves (no, Thorin, this does not mean it's clearly trash). Also known as "Beater" by the goblins of the Misty Mountains. Also was once used in the process of killing a Balrog of Morgoth.

4) Death's invisible sword (Discworld)

Wielder: Death (and Susan)

The sword of Death is a weapon so sharp as to be invisible, its blade discernable only by the blue flashes of the air molecules it cuts apart. Unfortunately for any prospective wielders, unless they're looking closely your enemies will think you're some idiot waving around a hilt with no stabby part.

5) Albitr/Tinkledeath (Eragon)

Wielder: Angela

Another transparent, exceedingly sharp blade able to cut through practically anything, Albitr (nicknamed "Tinkledeath" by Angela for the tinkling sound it makes when tapped) is described as "the ultimate ideal of an inclined plane". I've been wondering why it's in Inheritance at all, because Angela pulls it out once and demonstrates the cool stuff it can do... and then puts it away and never mentions it again. So... what is that about?

6) The Three-Handed Sword of the Guardian (The Adventurer's Guide)

Wielder: Rokk (and Anne)

The Three-Handed Sword of the Guardian is a gigantic weapon meant to be wielded by the equally gigantic PAL series robot Rokk, who has three arms. A hard-light version is also used by Anne (summoned with "Activate Three-Handed Sword of the Guardian").

7) Morningtide and Eventide (Diary of an 8-Bit Warrior)

Wielders: Breeze (Morningtide); Runt (Eventide) 

Diary of an 8-Bit Warrior is one of the best series of fan-made Minecraft books out there. These two swords don't get much pagetime, but I still like them.

 

8) The Sword of Exact Zero (The Lego Movie)

Wielder: Lord Business 

The Sword of Exact Zero is made of a material all but alien to the world in which it is used, sharper than any other blade known to that world's inhabitants. E.G. they're Lego people, and it's the blade of an X-Acto knife. This one is also not a major plot point, but it's here because I find Lord Business' line "Bring me the Sword of Exact Zero" hilarious.

9) Inferno/The Dragon Blade (How to Train Your Dragon movies)

Wielder: Hiccup

Also known as "Hiccup's flaming sword". It's included here because, come on, I had to have at least one flaming sword on the list somewhere. Also because I have a strange affection for the thing.

10) Diamond Sword (Minecraft)

Wielder: The Player (and occasionally various monsters if they kill you while you have one)

I was initially iffy about putting this one on here, because unlike the rest of the swords on the list, this is more of a class of weapon; you can make as many diamond swords in Minecraft as you want, as long as you have enough diamonds. But then I realized it would replace "Lightsaber", which is also a class of weapon, so... here it is. (And yes, I know netherite swords are technically better, but they're stupid hard to make, and the diamond sword is just kind of classic. This is a list of favorite swords, not a list of most powerful swords. Otherwise lightsabers would be on here.)

So, there you have it! This is, again, a list of favorite swords, not a list of best or coolest swords, so no complaining because Anduril / lightsabers / Zar'roc / Brisingr / Great Flameblades / the Dream Nail / chainswords / Myrtenaster / the Vorpal Sword aren't on here. 

 

Honestly, though, honorable mention to the Vorpal Sword (Jabberwocky/Dungeons and Dragons), whose only purpose is to decapitate things.

(Endnote: I was going to make an image to go at the top of the post, but as it turns out, there aren't any images on the Internet of either Albitr or the Three-Handed Sword of the Guardian. Which is just lame.)