Mini-Reviews 8: Oops, All Vega Jane

The Keeper by David Baldacci

In which we leave our dystopia and discover that the Intentionally Very Lethal Wilderness outside of it is that way because it's supposed to keep the dystopia's people in and everyone else out.

 

Also we find another, even more dystopian dystopia. And proceed to completely wreck the whole place and nope out of there. 

This is book 2.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T for violence and some bad language.

4 stars.

Tags for this one: 4-star, adventure, cool magic, dystopian, fantasy, rated T, series component, YA

The Width of the World by David Baldacci

In which we leave the Intentionally Very Lethal Wilderness and discover that our dystopia's dystopian-ness pales in comparison to the dystopian-ness of the dystopia that is the rest of the world. But at least the rest of the world has trains. While our dystopia was stuck in the Renaissance, the rest of the world has reached the 1920s.

Also, we get a reverse Renamed Concept Rule courtesy of getting used to the strange terminology over the last two books, then stumbling into a world where people use normal words.

This is book 3.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T for violence and some bad language.

4 stars.

 

Tags for this one: 4-star, adventure, cool magic, dystopian, fantasy, rated T, series component, YA

The Stars Below by David Baldacci

In which we discover that I actually can take the BBEG seriously even though his name is literally just "Necro".

 

I'm not sure what's going on with that title.

 

This is book 4.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T for violence and some bad language.

4 stars.

 

Tags for this one: 4-star, a kissing book, adventure, cool magic, dystopian, fantasy, rated T, series component, YA

(Endnote: You may have noticed that book 4 is slightly thinner than the other two. This isn't because that's how it is in real life, it's because the internet is loath to provide me with pictures that aren't squished.)

"The Barren Grounds" by David A. Robertson

I normally tend not to love stories that use "this book is made of [Insert Minority Here] culture!" as a selling point. Now, I have nothing against [Insert Minority Here] culture; it's just that [Insert Minority Here] culture is not usually a very good skeleton for a story. Or musculature, for that matter. Or skin. It's like tendons; it can be in there, and it can be important, but it shouldn't be the entire book. Unless you're very good at writing, or are writing nonfiction about that culture.

This book has those tendons. And also a bunch of other stuff. It was apparently somewhat inspired by Narnia, and I can definitely see that; it is about kids (just two this time) getting isekai'd, albeit through stapling a drawing to a wall rather than through all hiding in a closet, and it does involve an eternal winter and (sort of) has talking animals.

The kids are Morgan (the girl; the perpetually angry one) and Eli (the boy; the one who draws a lot, speaks Cree, and doesn't talk much). The animal people are Ochek (the bear-like one who's actually a fisher; I've seen pictures of actual fishers, and they are alternately adorable and terrifying) and Arik (the squirrel one, who seems to take great pleasure in sassing people. Sort of like real squirrels do.)

 

The picture of Arik is way too tiny, by the way. She's actually supposed to be like five feet tall, and I find it hard to believe that the picture is accurate if a simple analysis of scale suggests that it means Morgan is over eight feet.

Anyway, the plot revolves around this evil dude who stole the Birds That Make It To Where Summer Can Happen (not their actual name) and kept them in his house because... he wants to eat stuff? His logic is a bit questionable. So now it's always winter everywhere but in the evil dude's house and everyone but him is starving to death because it's always winter everywhere but in his house.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: E10+ for scary stuff and some violence (there's a wolf that tries to eat people, and people get shot at with arrows).

4 stars. I liked it rather well, even though I was shipping Ochek and Arik and then |Ochek died|. I'm pretty sure that's the first time on this blog I've ever referred to "shipping" characters.

(Endnote: In this book's case, the [Insert Minority Here] culture is "vaguely Canadian Indigenous". I honestly thought it was Inuit or something similar for like a third of the book, though.)

Mini-Reviews 7: Finish Him

The author of A Rover's Story has also written a book called The Shape of Thunder. We all know thunder is sound, and sound is a shockwave, and shockwaves in three dimensions are spherical, but it's interrupted by the ground, so the shape of thunder is: an oblate spheroid.

The Finisher by David Baldacci

Somehow, that was less dystopian than I was expecting. And higher-magic than I was expecting. The dystopia is run by people who have the best interests of its people at heart, except they have a warped idea of what said interests are.

Also, the Renamed Concept Rule strikes again! But less bad this time, probably because the book itself is fairly well-written.

(The titular "Finisher" actually refers to the main character; it's her job. She's the one who does the final artisanry in the factory in the book's town.)

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T for creepy stuff, some swearing, and violence.

4 stars. This has promise.

Tags for this one: 4-star, dystopian, fantasy, rated T, series component

The Education of Ivy Blake by Ellen Airgood

You've heard of Terrible Modern Fictional Dads, now get ready for... drumroll please Terrible Modern Fictional Moms!

And also Actually Perfectly Okay Modern Fictional Everyone Other Than The Main Character's Mom, including an Really Fairly Nice Modern Fictional Dad of Someone Else. It's really just Ivy's mom who's terrible. 

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T for substance abuse by the Terrible Modern Fictional Mom and some redacted swearing.

3 stars.

Tags for this one: 3-star, modern setting, rated T

A Rover's Story by Jasmine Warga

I must admit that I got this book out of the library fully expecting it to be kind of lame. Thankfully, it was actually good!

Also the front quote is from the author of this one.

Res (Resilience) is completely adorable.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: E. It could be an okay videogame.

4 stars.

Tags for this one: 4-star, rated E, science fiction, space

(Endnote: Did you know the theme music for Mortal Kombat is actually based on a Finnish hymn?)

"The Disaster Days" by Rebecca Behrens

You're alone after an earthquake now, trying to survive

Also you're like thirteen

And you live on an island in the middle of nowhere in Washington State

And you have two other kids to babysit

 

So you're not at home

And you are completely and wildly unprepared for all of this 

And you don't actually know how to deal with someone getting a giant gash in their arm

And you have to leave the house because gas leak

And you also don't actually know how to deal with someone breaking their leg

And you don't ever get contacted by any other survivors until the very end even though there have to be other people alive on your island

 

And you don't actually know how to deal with someone's giant arm gash getting infected

And your house sank

And you'd get rated E10+ for scenes of peril if you were a videogame

And you've been given 4 stars by me

 

(Also you have an endnote: What if I wrote this entire post in single sentences and left out all the end marks)

"Mythical Doorways" anthology

This is getting out of hand, now there are two four of them! Actually there's like 12 of these anthologies, but I've only read four. [EDIT: no, there's actually six.]

"Everwild" by J. M. Hackman: An orphan gets too old for foster care, then discovers both he and the girl he has a crush on are actually fairies. This one's fairly good.

"Well of Fate" by Savannah Jezowski: Y'all remember Ratatosk from the Norse myths? This is him.

"Jericho and the Magician's Daughter" by H. L. Burke: The magic system is imaginative. The story is okay.

"Dragon's Oath" by Katy Huth Jones: Some kid has a terrible crush on a girl whose dad is set against it. He overreacts and leaves the village entirely. Apparently some sort of prequel to some other stuff this author's written.

"The Hallway of Three Doors" by D. G. Driver: Feels like it stumbles into allegory territory, takes a long look, and then nopes out of there to go start a village instead.

"Door Number Four" by Bokerah Brumley: No relation to the previous story. This one's about trainee interdimensional animal rescuers.

"Threshold" by Laurie Lucking: A girl has to choose between living in fairyland or the real world. Not as depressing as it sounds.

 

"Idiot's Graveyard" by Arthur Daigle: Dana Illwind and Sorcerer Lord Jayden are baaaaaaaack! My favorite story in this collection.

 

"Cosmic Cravings" by AJ Bakke: A mouse wizard attempts to create a dimensional portal to Earth in order to replenish her supply of chocolate, heedless of the fact that creating dimensional portals is stupidly dangerous.

 

"Dragon Ward" by Jenelle Leanne Schmidt: A girl is being chased by an angry dragon, then they both get isekai'd.

 

"What Lies Ahead" by Laurie Lynch: An ancient Roman escaped slave uses time travel to... change absolutely nothing about the past.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: E10+ for fantasy violence. "Well of Fate", "Door Number Four", "Idiot's Graveyard", and "Cosmic Cravings" could all make fairly good videogames; I think "Well of Fate" would do quite well as an old-school text adventure. The others are either too character-based to have much player agency ("Everwild", "What Lies Ahead", "Dragon's Oath", and "Threshold"), too short ("Dragon Ward"), or too hard to translate effectively into mechanics ("The Hallway of Three Doors"). "Jericho and the Magician's Daughter" could do okay as a videogame, but I just don't like it enough to speculate much.

4 stars.

(Endnote: It appears this is the one where they stopped having objectionable content. Which is good.)

"Hall of Heroes" anthology

Behold the third (and, so far, longest) one of these collections that I've read!

"Alancia's Dance" by H. L. Burke: A technically-not-matador-but-only-because-this-isn't-Spain woman meets Totally Not Daedalus, then falls in love. The king disapproves. I didn't really like this one.

"The Hero Feat of Hannah Helstrom" by J. Philip Horne: Superheroes, including one whose power is regeneration and literally nothing else. This one is decent.

"In Plain Sight" by Arthur Daigle: A stage magician with animated (non-creepy) dolls |turns out to be a real magician slash mad scientist with animated objects that are a lot more dangerous|. One of the best ones in the collection.

"Finn MacRorie and the River Dragon" by Katy Huth Jones: Ireland/Scotland, [insert year]: A random knight-errant shows up at a village, fixes this one family's problems, and then leaves. It feels like something out of an Irish/Scottish-flavored King Arthur legend.

"Little Victories" by Karin De Havin: Local escaped-pet-whisperer accidentally discovers injured fairy. This one isn't anything terribly special, but it's a solid story.

"And Only the Eyes of Children" by Laura VanArendonk Baugh: Turns out the Fair Folk do not like {T15+ at least child sex trafficking}. Well-executed, if not very appropriate for young readers.

"The Demon Monkeys" by A. R. Silverberry: Medieval non-European-flavored village is terrorized by demon monkeys. |Who are actually just bandits carrying howler monkeys|. Then a wizard(ish person) shows up. This one is okay.

"Superhero Publicist" by Janeen Ippolito: Exactly what it sounds like. A publicist for superheroes/supervillains has to deal with a supervillain who abruptly became a superhero instead due to converting to Christianity. The premise is good. The story is okay.

"Sweet Basil" by Lea Doué: Magic Is Banned™. Our protagonist has magic. You can see where this is going.

"Darkness Follows the Light" by David Millican: I mean, if there were evil child-stealing monsters, they probably would hang around bad neighborhoods. This one is not appropriate for children.

"Presenting... The Steampendous Adventures of Josiah U. Bear and the Rubber Barons" by D. W. Frauenfelder: A vaguely turn-of-the-century-esque story involving a nation of talking bears. Requires a lot of suspension of disbelief.

"River's Edge Ransom" by Julie C. Gilbert: Apparently part of a larger series. Fantasy. It's okay, I guess.

"The Love Talker" by Deanna Fugett: There's an evil monster that goes around breaking girls' hearts for the heck of it. There are also some protagonists. This one is decent, but not my cup of cheese.

"Gem" by RJ Conte: An alternate-universe world is attempting to shake itself to pieces. Except: That world's God has given them psions that can hold it together with their brains. Except: They never actually get to be more than about seven before the world tries to shake itself to pieces again. Less depressing than it sounds.

"Leticia's Song" by Jessica L. Elliott: Sort of like that one fairytale with the guys who get turned into swans. Also somewhat involves Not!Pandora's Box. This one is decent.

"The Wooden Ruler" by David Millican: Turns out if you make sentient gnome dolls, they might get too sentient. And view you as eldritch horrors. This is definitely an interesting read.

"The Tale of Sir Ronan of Camelot" by Frank B. Luke: Strongly Camelot-flavored, with a pronounced secondary taste of allegory. Didn't like it much.

"A Fiery Gift" by A. J. Bakke: Adorable volcano otters! And some point it's trying to make, probably, but I'm just here for the adorable volcano otters.

"The Hero of Emoh: A Parent's Fairytale" by Sarah Ashwood: DNF'd this one because I could just taste the sappiness and the spelling-things-backwards and was not in the mood for that. I'm still not.

"Sacrifice to the Iara" by H. L. Burke: Sort of ancient-South-American-civilization-flavored. It's got the winged and feathered serpents for that, at least. Well-executed.

"Charla Visits Earth" by Diane Astle: Fish-out-of-water where the fish is actually a mermaid, making that phrase both metaphorical and literal for this case. This one is okay.

"Cry of the Cave Lion" by E. Kaiser Writes: Cave lions. And the hunter-gatherers who hunt them.

"Save the Day" by Page Zaplendam: Teenage superheroes. A fairly realistic take on that subgenre, in fact. This is one of the better stories in here.

"Boy of Sand and Sky" by Laura Matthias Bendoly: Ancient France! But with a kid who can do miracles, and who apparently factors into some other stuff this author's written.

"Teamwork" by Laura VanArendonk Baugh: Have you ever heard of the "Choking Doberman" urban legend? It's basically {T a dog starts mysteriously choking, and when taken to the vet, turns out to be choking on some severed human fingers}. This story is just that urban legend in short story form.

"The Ungifted Twin" by Tamie Dearen: Classic "girl with no magic power in universe where everyone has a magic power" story. This one is okay.

"Not Quite a Hero" by Arthur Daigle: The mayor's intrepid daughter and... how do I even begin to describe Sorcerer Lord Jayden? They meet for the first time in this, then fight a giant shapeshifting monster made of dead stuff. This is my favorite story in the entire collection.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T15+ for child abuse and sexual references.

On the low side of 4 stars; would have been 3, but "Not Quite a Hero" exists.

(Endnote: Arthur Daigle is fast rising in the ranks of my favorite authors. The nonexistent ranks, because I don't actually have a list.)

Mini-Reviews 6: Half-Blood Prince

Ticker: The Quest to Create an Artificial Heart by Mimi Swartz

This is certainly informative, especially so since I don't usually go in for biomedical engineering. It was published in 2018, but according to my research (read: I looked at the article "artificial heart" on Wikipedia) nobody's yet managed to make a complete one that's available for anything other than experiments.

Were this a videogame, its subject matter would get rated: T15+ for gore, because this is heart surgery.

However, the book handles it in a way that's: also T15+, but for strong language (including one instance of The Cardinal Swearword) and some sexual references.

4 stars.

Tags for this one: 4-star, nonfiction, rated T15+

Battlesong by Lian Tanner

Behold the third book in this trilogy (second book here). I probably won't ever read the first book, but you never know.

We do manage to |defeat the angry uber-Luddites for good| in this one, courtesy of |finding a hidden science facility| (Aperture Science, anyone?) and any sufficiently advanced technology being indistinguishable from magic. And if you live in a world that's been forcibly regressed to medieval times, modern technology counts as sufficiently advanced.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T for the same things as the other one.

4 stars.

Tags for this one: 4-star, dystopian, rated T, series component

Minecraft: The Crash by Tracey Baptiste

This is an interesting look at how to handle sudden grief and other strong emotions, but I'm not sure I needed that from a Minecraft book.

At least they have their version be explicitly modded in this. Honestly, "It's modded" is the solution to basically every "There are no [insert thing] in Minecraft!" plot hole ever (I'm looking at you, Winter Morgan's unrealistic command blocks), but... I've seen two books use it, now, and one of them is this.

 

Nothing ever crashes in this one, making this a case of a Somewhat Misleading Title™.

Minecraft is a videogame, and it's rated: E10+ for fantasy violence. This one has grievous injury as well (car accident).

4 stars.

Tags for this one: 4-star, adventure, Minecraft, modern setting, rated E10+

(Endnote: What if the people in Sunker's Deep and Battlesong cracked into a nuclear isolation facility and didn't know what it was because none of them can read? I see no way that could end horribly.)