"The Long Earth" by Terry Pratchett and Stephen Baxter

This is the only book I have ever read which includes an AI who's actually a random guy from Tibet reincarnated into a supercomputer.

It starts out as basically a thought experiment in "What if modern society suddenly gained the ability to travel through a multiverse of people-less Earths?" In other words, what would happen to society if scarcity of resources was suddenly no longer a concern?

So we're tied up in various vignettes for most of the first part of the book. The actual main plot consists of  a zeppelin, piloted by the reincarnated Tibetan supercomputer and crewed by one 28-year-old who's been hanging out in the various alternate Earths for most of his life and consequently reads more like an 18-year-old, traveling far along the strip of alternate Earths to see what's out there and look for any anomalies.

This does not really read like a Terry Pratchett book. There are definite bits of Pratchett in there (the reincarnated Tibetan supercomputer, for one), but it's not as funny as all his other books I've read, and it has a lot more swearing. I've never seen the Cardinal Swearword in a Terry Pratchett book (the closest he comes is all the "ing" jokes in The Truth), and it crops up several times here. Personally, I suspect those (and other bits that didn't seem Pratchetty) to be the work of the co-author.

There's a story in A Blink of the Screen, "The High Meggas", that was apparently the original version of The Long Earth. However, the two have several key differences, which occasionally tripped me up while I was reading this.

One minor character in this book is named Percy Blakeney. I... assume that he is not secretly the Scarlet Pimpernel. On the other hand, maybe he's just really good at hiding it.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: M for bad language (including multiple instances of the Cardinal Swearword), some sexual references, and some homosexual references. Which... {T15+ish soliloquy on that subject those bug me less as the age level of the surrounding work rises; most of my objection is when they crop up in things for people who aren't of an age to know about that yet. Homosexuality is a sin, yes, but no more so than heterosexuality outside of marriage, which we all seem to be oddly fine with. This concludes my soliloquy.}

3 stars.

(Endnote: There are five other books in this series, those being The Long War, The Long Mars, The Long Utopia, The Long Cosmos, and The Long Cat.)

"To Hell and Back" by Audie Murphy

I'm having a hard time writing this review without coming off as flippant.

As with most historical books that are also written as a narrative, To Hell and Back is somewhat fictionalized. I do however trust that it remains reasonably accurate.

For all that it's what Audie Murphy is famous for, the book spends hardly any time on the Colmar Pocket incident. I was honestly impressed by the lack of glorification of that.

I read this book for school; it's not part of my first completed quest, unlike almost everything I've been reading lately.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: M for swearing and graphic violence. It does not shy away from depicting what the Second World War was actually like.

[EDIT, 5/5/2026: 4 stars, upon reflection.]

(Endnote: I probably could have said more if I were less serious about it, but this isn't really a book you can be unserious about.)

Mini-Reviews 15: It's The Long Title Song!

Handbook of Consolations for the Fears and Trials that Oppress Us in the Struggle with Death by Johann Gerhard 

I thought this book was some sort of grief counseling, for when someone you love dies.

It is not.

This book is for when you are the one dying, or when you're talking to someone who is, and you/they are struggling with your faith. It's written in the classic ancient-greek-philosophy-instruction style of "Student: I have a question, and it's this! Teacher: I have an answer to that question, and it's this."

It's quite good. If I'm ever dying of sickness, someone please send me a copy.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: E10+ for discussion of death.

4 stars.

Tags for this one: 4-star, Christian nonfiction, nonfiction, rated E10+

The Story of Be by David Crystal

I got this out of the library on a whim because it looked interesting. It was, in fact, interesting.

While I (as a firm believer in the Tower of Babel) disagree with it on where languages came from, most of the rest of it is pretty informative.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T15+ for sexual references ({T15+ish describing the "sexual be", as in "being with someone"}).

3 stars. Not amazing, but it's definitely not bad.

Tags for this one: 3-star, nonfiction, rated T15+

The Innocent by David Baldacci

I have now read a thriller. Yay me.

It's about this special forces assassin guy who gets almost assassinated himself (repeatedly), then teams up with a teenage girl who's been having a bad time in foster care and whose parents have just been murdered. Because person or persons unknown keep trying to assassinate the both of them, and also keep assassinating other people who they try to get evidence from.

Also known as "489 pages of the plot thickening and 57 pages of 'oh yeah, it's all coming together.'"

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: M for mostly offscreen sexual content between two adults (which I skipped over anyway), strong language (though no Cardinal Swearwords that I recall), and semi-graphic violence. This is a book for adults.

3 stars.

Tags for this one: 3-star, modern setting, rated M, thriller

(Endnote: I'm really starting to run out of titles for these things.)

"All Quiet on the Western Front" by Erich Maria Remarque

This is my final essay for that literature class. Not in the sense of a final project, more in the sense of "it's ending after this year and I won't be writing essays for it anymore." So here goes.

All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque

 

All Quiet on the Western Front is probably the world’s most famous war novel. Set during the First World War from the perspective of a German soldier, it shows the horror and brutality of war through that soldier’s experience.

The book’s setting is spread through almost all of the First World War, from the beginning to near the end. World War One is uniquely suited as the setting for a novel which aims to demonstrate just how terrible modern warfare can be. Though all wars are, by definition, violent, the First World War saw the introduction and refinement of modern weaponry such as machine guns, poison gas, flamethrowers, and tanks, as well as the first major example of trench warfare (though earlier wars such as the American Civil War displayed rudimentary forms). This, combined with the fact that it was waged on an unprecedented (though not unparalleled) scale and led to suffering in most of the European world for soldiers and civilians alike, makes it fit well with a message of “war is horrible.” In addition, the author served in this war and based the book on his experiences, lending it increased realism.

All Quiet on the Western Front is not particularly subtle with its message. It portrays the First World War and, by extension, war in general, as horrific, and through that hammers home the point that war is bad for people and shouldn’t happen. Erich Maria Remarque wrote it specifically as an anti-war novel, as well as to showcase the widespread disillusionment and trauma of the German people after the war. This is reflected in the character arc (what there is of it) of the main character, as well as the plot.

There is no real structure to the plot of this book. The main character and narrator, Paul Baumer, wanders through the war doing what he is told and internally philosophizing about it, and the plot wanders accordingly. There are no overarching story arcs, and even the main character’s arc is confined to being rendered increasingly emotionally unstable by the toll the war takes on him. It is the side characters who provide most of what narrative there is, as readers grow familiar with them and their actions; Paul Baumer himself either omits himself and his actions from the story or simply doesn’t have much of a personality (aside from the philosophizing, that is). Their deaths are thus an emotional blow to the reader, though the impact is dulled somewhat by the narrator’s detachment and stoicism. Notably, their absence has no real impact on the tone of the story, though this does serve to illustrate Paul Baumer’s attitude of “if you ignore the bad parts, they hurt less.”

In conclusion, All Quiet on the Western Front illustrates the horrors of war through the somewhat directionless journey of Paul Baumer, a German soldier, during the First World War.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: M. It's violent (often graphically), depressing, and occasionally obscene. That said, war is also all of those things.

3 stars. It's famous and respected and all, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.

(Endnote: This is the first book I've rated M in the entire time I've had this blog. There are nonfiction books [mostly history books about wars] who've gotten their subject matter rated M, but their content wasn't.)

"War on the Frontier: The Trans-Mississippi West" by Alvin M. Josephy Jr.

This is a book about the American Civil War, specifically (as the title says) the parts in the Trans-Mississippi West. I don't actually really have anything to say about it, this review is just to point out the unintentional hilarity of a historical picture featured in the book.

This picture was created in 1862 by John Stevens, a sign painter, which may help explain the strangeness. It's reactionary and anti-Native-American and racist, and it was created for fearmongering purposes, so it wasn't intended to be funny...

I had to scan this, so the image quality might be kinda bad.

What I'm pretty sure is supposed to be going on in this picture: Shirtless Guy, after murdering two of Green Woman's children, is trying to murder a third while Green Woman tries to pull her child away. Meanwhile, Blue Kid throws out his arms in an attempt to protect his family.

What it looks like is going on in this picture: Shirtless Guy and Green Woman are having a tug-of-war over a badly-proportioned small child. Green Woman is attempting to Force-push Shirtless Guy, and Blue Kid is T-posing over two of his siblings (or possibly one sibling with a doll) in the background.

 

It was the T-posing that elevated this from "ok weird" to "this is funny and I should make a blog post on it so other people can see how funny it is". John Stevens's history as a sign painter, coupled with the (lack of) artistic quality of the picture, leads me to believe he never actually had any formal training. And probably didn't understand how to pose people so they look realistic (the T-posing kid strikes again) or to draw children so they don't just look like tiny adults.

 

Yes, I know this picture plays into a lot of the prejudices of its time. I'm not laughing at the racism, I'm laughing at the T-posing kid and the woman in green's attempts to use the Force.

Were this a videogame, its subject matter would get rated: M to AO for graphic violence, like all the war books.

However, the book handles it in a way that's more: T15+ for graphic violence (massacres by Native Americans, and massacres of Native Americans--it went both ways--are not pleasant).

4 stars. Informative.

(Endnote: I reviewed The Dreadnoughts because I like dreadnoughts, and I reviewed this because I thought something in it was funny. There's a vast ocean of other books in these series that I haven't reviewed.)

"Walk Through Fire" by Yasmine S. Ali, MD

This is a book about the 1978 Waverly train disaster, which with 98% certainty you didn't know about before reading this article. (Or before I told you, if you're my mom.) Basically, a train derailed in the middle of the town of Waverly, Tenessee. Then, two days later, a tank car full of petroleum exploded and swamped the local hospital in burn victims.

This book is honestly very well-written, for all that it tells the story fairly non-linearly (e.g. starting with something in one chapter and going back to the life and times of someone random in the next chapter). It all ties together around 2/3 of the way through the book, when the tank car exploded. The author has a way with words that makes the random snippets of seemingly unrelated people interesting enough that readers (read: me) don't get bored and DNF the book.

Also, it's written by the daughter of the head surgeon at the hospital that got swamped in burn victims. I didn't realize that until I'd finished the book and got to the author bio at the back.

Were this a videogame, its subject matter would get rated: M for graphic violence.

However, the book handles it in a way that's more: T15+ for matter-of-fact descriptions of things like people getting their skin burned off.

4 stars. It's almost good enough to get 5, but not quite.

 

(Endnote: Our library has a display called "Learn Something New and Oddly Specific", which is where I found this book and that book about heart surgery that's currently languishing in an unfinished mini-review collection. I keep telling the librarians it's a great idea in hopes that they'll keep it around for longer.)

"Wade McClusky and the Battle of Midway" by David Rigby

I suppose this all just goes to show that I am not used to reading adult history books.

For one thing, it sometimes felt like a full 20% of the book was citations. Pretty much any time the author mentioned a date, event, person's name, argument, number, piece of cheese, or cat, he cited a source for it. (Note: I don't think he actually mentioned any cheese or cats in this.)

I have been assured that such things are normal in such books, but it kinda surprised me.

While reading a particular section, I was reminded of a line from a Cul de Sac comic: "I have only just begun to delve into the infinite possibilities of minutia." The section in question was about how many planes attacked the carrier Akagi during the battle; after citing more sources than I would have thought possible and writing down the thoughts on the matter of every eyewitness he could find, Rigby concluded that there were almost assuredly five planes attacking the Akagi, not three or eight.

The author spent a lot of time refuting the popular (apparently) opinion that McClusky didn't know what he was doing during the Battle of Midway. I think he succeeded, as I came away convinced that he did in fact know what he was doing. It got a little repetitive after a while, though.

About half the book was a biography of Wade McClusky himself. (I can never type his name right on the first try, by the way; I always mistype it McClusly or something and have to correct myself.) Then the other half was the battle of Midway, which sort of came in the middle of the biography. This makes sense, but it was still like "Biography biography biography !MIDWAY! biography biography."

Due to dragging in parts, I'm giving this three stars.

Were this a videogame, its subject matter would get rated: Like with my review of The Great War, M to AO. War is... not pleasant, y'all.

However, the book handles it in a way that's more: E10+. Fine for younger people, but they probably wouldn't want to read 350 pages of mostly nitpicking and citations.

As with every time I read and review something my mom also has, here's a link to her review.

"The Tough Guide to Fantasyland" by Diana Wynne Jones

Well, that... wasn't what I was expecting.

 

I suppose I should have expected it to be written like a guidebook, seeing as it's "The Tough Guide to Fantasyland" and all. But I didn't.

I don't actually have a lot to say about this one. Not great (unlike Howl's Moving Castle or its as-yet-unreviewed-by-me sequel, House of Many Ways, its humor doesn't actually act like humor to me); not terrible (unlike the as-yet-unreviewed-by-me-because-it's-super-awful Ice Wolves, which I have yelled about peripherally.)

But anyway, I suppose it's a sort of spoof of bad fantasy. It's a guidebook to the titular Fantasyland, including entries on "Chilblains" (nobody ever gets them), "Horse" (the kind of horse-that-acts-like-a-motorcycle-with-legs you find in bad fantasy books), and many other things. If you have the type of sense of humor to enjoy it, it's probably great. It just... didn't work out for me.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T to M. I should really just come up with another rating, something like "T15+", for things like this and The Great War and Fahrenheit 451 that get rated "T to M".

As you may have guessed from my review, this book gets two stars. My appreciation of it was really more two and a half, but I round down for these things.

 

Favorite lines: 

 

  There's a heading near the beginning of the book called "Other Tough Guides", none of which actually exist. My favorites are "The Tough Guide to Boating on Mars", "The Tough Guide to Transport in the Multiverse (mostly by Telephone Box)", and "The Tough Guide to Black Holes (unaccountably missing)".

Link to the actual post.

"The Great War: Perspectives on the First World War" edited by Robert Cowley

So, as you can see, I don't review much nonfiction. (Caveat lector: the newer, smaller "nonfiction" tag is for nonfictional stuff that I have reviewed since 2021. The older "non-fiction" tag is for nonfiction reviewed before then; I don't quite disown anything under that tag, but it's kind of terrible.)

Anyway, this book is rather obviously about World War One, aka the Great War, aka the War to End All Wars. It's a collection of essays on various WWI topics ranging from the Battle of Jutland (Jutland, by John Keegan; pages 154-177) to the Red Baron (The War Lover, by Robert Wohl; pages 271-285) to the First Battle of the Falklands (The First Battle of the Falklands, by Ronald H. Spector; pages 124-140). The essays are of varying quality, ranging from 2 to 4 stars. I'll summarize particularly notable ones below.

One of the earlier ones (possibly even the first; can't remember which) had an approximately 3-page documentation of the etymology of the phrase "no-man's-land". It was super boring. If you ever read the book, just skip that, unless you're into 3-page etymologies.

 

The Christmas Truce (pages 50-64), by Stanley Weintraub, was about the Christmas truce of 1914. It was a weirdly heartwarming episode in the middle of an otherwise super horrific conflict, and almost assuredly one of the more... kid-friendly essays in here. Pretty sure I smiled all the way through it, only to stop smiling again when the next essay was about the Battle of Aubers and had a horrifically huge death toll again.

(Side note: You may notice I use the word "horrific" twice there. This was World War 1, it killed 15 to 22 million people.)

Section 3 was the polished jewel of the collection, containing only 25% lackluster essays and some of the book's best. (Note: I am biased to essays/books/what-have-you describing large machinery, so bear that in mind.) I mentioned Jutland and The First Battle of the Falklands earlier, and the only other noteworthy one was The Wreck of the Magdeburg (pages 141-153) by David Kahn. 

The German warship Magdeburg was a normal small cruiser (smaller than a light cruiser), which went aground off an island in the Gulf of Finland. It was carrying important stuff and they couldn't let it get captured, so they blew it up. 

Except it didn't work completely, and Russia was able to recover some stuff. This included what they termed "Codebook 151", which they sent to the British codebreaking agency, and... well, they broke it. Knowledge ensued.

On pages 215-216 (territory of Kut, by Robert F. Jones), there's a description of a death march. I don't actually know how graphic it was, because I saw the words "death march" and skipped to the end of the essay. Let the prospective reader beware.

 

"These Hideous Weapons" (pages 307-319), by Bruce I. Gudmundsson, is about flamethrowers. I learned some interesting stuff about them, including that they were mostly operated by former firemen (remind you of anything?) and that the French ones were manufactured by a maker of cigarette lighters.

 

Die Pariskanone (pages 404-409) was about a giant cannon capable of firing shells 65 miles and hitting Paris with them. It was broken up at the end of the war, but then some guy in the 60s "[left the Canadian government] to pursue his real interest: very big guns." That line just cracked me up. (The guy ended up going to prison and eventually being assassinated for supplying very big guns to various less-than-savory countries who could pay for them.)

 

Were this a videogame, its subject matter would get rated: M. Possibly AO. It was WWI.

However, the book handles it in a way that's more: T15+.

Overall, this book gets 4 stars. It had its boring parts.

Link to the actual post.

Videogame ratings guide

Another non-review, this time explaining the ESRB videogame ratings (which I use in my reviews). Should be pretty short.

EC: Early Childhood. This one's been retired due to infrequency of use, but it was videogames for little kids. I don't read many books that would have been rated it.

E: Everyone. Similar to the G rating for movies; nothing objectionable here.

E10+: Everyone 10 or older. Contains "more cartoon, fantasy, or mild violence [than E]; mild language".

T: Teen. It's like PG-13 for movies. May contain "violence, crude humor, minimal blood, and the infrequent use of strong language" (their words, not mine).

T15+: Teens 15 or older. It's in between T and M becuase I realized the scale needed another shade of grey between those two. This is usually the upper limit of what I read.

M: Mature 17+. Basically R, except for videogames instead. I read almost no books that would get rated M, and for good reason.

AO: Adults Only (18+). There have only ever been 27, and it's for games that shouldn't exist but do for some reason (or involve gambling with real money, I think). I read exactly no books that would get rated AO, and for better reason. Probably the equivalent of an NC-17 rating for movies.

There you have it. I will probably never link to this page; linking to Rating System with all the star ratings is enough.

Link to the actual post.

"Fahrenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury

 

Going into this book, I was predisposed to not like it. I suppose having a book suggested to me makes me think "oh, this book was recommended by someone I know, therefore I have to pretend I like it to them, therefore I'm going to resent it and not like it". Couple that with the fact that it's dystopian fiction (which I don't tend to like), and... I wasn't super not enthused going in, but I also wasn't super enthused.

It's hard to actually describe the plot without breaking my "don't spoil anything you wouldn't find in the first few chapters [though this one doesn't really have short enough chapters for that] or the cover blurb" code and/or covering the page in |spoiler| tags. If you want a better description, go to my mom's review here. If you want to hear what I thought of it, though, stay on this page.

I spend most of the first half of my initial read-through going "gahhhHHHHhhhh why do I have to read this book for school???". Had I not been reading it for school, I probably would have just DNF'd it and chucked the whole thing into the 2-star wall incinerator, there to be wall incinerated. (Wall incinerators are a thing within the book; it's an incinerator in your wall, not an incinerator for incinerating walls.)

Thankfully, I was reading it for school, which meant I had to finish it. It gets better, sufficiently enough to rate it 4 stars; the ending was appropriately foreshadowed and yet completely unexpected, and it was good.

Were this a videogame, I'd rate it: T to M, depending on how realistically you depict the violence. Leans a bit more toward the M side of the scale, in my opinion. I don't think a Fahrenheit 451 game would sell very well at all.

Link to the actual post.